Woke up this morning with a weird feeling... then I realised the reason and what that 'weird' feeling was about. It's actually that heavy sense of loss... aching heart and feeling of hopelessness. I lost the most important things in my life which I'd never recover. Today marks the 3rd month since Chloe left the sanctuary of her mummy's tummy... the one and only place that would have kept her safe and alive till today -- if only she'd stayed inside for a little while longer... just a little longer...
3 months have passed and did the pain lessen over time? - No. It actually feels worse and sharper than ever...
Has my tears diminished? - Nope.
Is there a day or even an hour that I don't think of her? - No. I think of her when I see a pretty fluffy cloud, when I hear children's laughter, when I see a pretty dress, when I see babies... I think of her when I see my lips in my reflection.
Has my heart healed? - No. And I am fairly sure it never will no matter it's 3 months, 3 years or 30 years later.
Have I 'moved on' (as some people have told me to..) - Absolutely NOT.
**********************************************************************************
This is for my friend, DG, who is also going through a bad patch right now. **DG, You know I have been pretty intrigued and mildly obsessed with 'Angels' lately... I know you are not a believer, but this is for you. Hope you can find some comfort in the arms of an Angel... at least for a moment or two.
No comments:
Post a Comment