Last evening we had dinner at my parent's place because Mark had requested for a home-cooked meal made by my mom. He's taken a liking to my mom's cooking ever since my mom retired and with a lot of time in her hands, she had started experimenting with new dishes. I can tell that my mom enjoys cooking for us, and she likes to see Mark and I cleaning up our plates. On normal days, she just cooks for herself, my dad and my younger sis... My dad is a very small eater and my sis is a very picky eater, so that doesn't give my mom much chance to try out new dishes.
Anyway, I went over to my parent's place in the afternoon and Mark was to join me after work. While I was waiting for the lift there, I bumped into the neighbour next door and we exchanged small talk i.e. 'Oh the weather is so hot!' (the weather IS REALLY FREAKING HOT). Then I was totally taken aback when she suddenly asked me 'Oh, you are expecting?'. I mumbled 'yes' and then stupidly asked her 'Is it that obvious??'. I thought I had covered up rather well with a baggy top.. and then I told her 'Can you please not tell my parents?'. Poor lady looked puzzled but didn't probe any further.
For the record, till now no one in my family knows that I am pregnant. Or perhaps even if they suspected, no one asked us anything. Previously, my mom was always the first person that we informed once we found out. It is not that we don't want to tell them this time, but I am really afraid of yet another failure and giving them false hopes once again. I know how much my parents are looking forward to have a grandchild, and I know very well how much my previous miscarriages have broken their hearts and made them so worried. I know how concerned they are about my mental and physical health, even until today. I really can't bear to raise their hopes and then single-handedly dash it again (and in my case, it is again and again and again). Moreover, I think it's no point letting them know early and having them worry along with me on a daily basis.
I still don't know when or how we will break the news to them... maybe I will just wait until it becomes too obvious. For now, it's a case of 'the neighbour knows and my parent's don't'. Hope that neighbour keeps her word.
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