Saturday, April 16, 2011


My little bun has doubled it's length from the last time I saw it 10 days ago!! I only started to breathe normally AFTER I saw the flicker of its heart pumping furiously away... and was so happy to see from the scan how much it has developed . There are the beginings of its limbs and the little dark 'dots' that mark its little fingers and toes (not bones yet, only soft cartilage at this stage). Its sillhouette is starting to resemble that of a human baby (previously it looked tadpole-like).

While Dr Anu was doing the scan, I guess the probe must've 'disturbed' little bun cos from the monitor, we could see that it started to wriggle around, move it's arms and then it turned on it's side to face us squarely! I told Dr Anu that the image on her monitor is to me one of the most beautiful sights created by Mother Nature (possibly only second to holding your own baby in your arms for the first time)... I had to fight back tears because after a long wait, my womb is once again filled with a life that Mark and I have created. Don't quite know how to describe that feeling...

All that I pray for now is for this little life to stay inside me for the next 6 months until he/she is strong enough to come into the world. The road ahead is still long and fraught with uncertainties, but I know that Mark and I will do anything within our means to give little bun a fighting chance. I also know that no matter what the future brings, Mark will be there to hold my hand.



(I kept thinking about Chloe after that scan... I still recall the time when during one of the routine scans that we saw her happily sucking on her thumb on the monitor. It was so amazing, and so sweet. Although we didn't get a picture of it, I know it is a sight that I will never forget. When I was little, I used to suck on my right thumb to lull myself to sleep, and my mom only managed to wean me out of this habit when I was 7 years old. From that moment, I took it as a sign that I was expecting a girl... and true enough this was confirmed a few weeks later. Missing my princess...)




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