Haze, Haze... Go Away...

I was as sick as a dog for most part of last week with fever, sore throat, cough.. you know, the works. I blame it on the stupid haze that had been plaguing us. NO thanks to the farmers in our neighbouring country who burn down their forests for agricultural usage annually. 

My poor boys have had to stay indoors for many days and our previous weekend was spent cooped up in the air-conditioned house!! 

The haze has gone (at least for a while..) but I still have a persistent cough. Praying hard that I don't pass it on to the boys. Poor Mr Sun is fighting to shine through the hazy skies... Photo was taken when the PSI was in the range of 300s. **cough cough**

Modelling the burp cloth that was lovingly handmade by my friend in the US. She made it for me after I had little bun, and I am still happily using it with little bun #2! 

This is a friend whom I have never met for the first 2-3 years we knew each other. I didn't have a clue how she looked like until she found me on Facebook.. it was only then we knew how each other looked like!! Hehehe.. We got to know each other through our love for our dogs and bonded over our shared experience of sub-fertility/ PCOS.

*Note: No baby was harmed in the process of taking the above photos.. in fact, that was one very contented and well-fed baby waiting to be burped. 

**contented sigh** I love this little boy so much... Looking back, I find it very hard to believe that before Dr Anu placed him in my arms, I was worried about not being able to love him the way I love little bun. My fears were totally unfounded. How not to love his cute face that greets me every morning??

I cannot believe my luck that we have been blessed with such a sweet, contented and easy-going baby. With little bun, I already thought we had it easy as he was not a difficult baby too, but with little bun #2, we totally hit jackpot!! He is the most undemanding baby and readily gives you a gummy grin when you so much as just chuck his chin or call his name. All that is needed to keep him happy is to stick to his schedule of drink, sleep, play (repeat)..

In the last couple of days, he's been attempting to roll over onto his tummy.. it is really funny to watch because he keeps toppling back onto his back. Looking forward to watching this little one grow up. He's going to be a joy to be around with. 

Chloe Lee - 4th Year Anniversary

I think this is without a doubt my most 'hated' period of the year... Every year, I dread it when the month of June looms. It just brings with it too many bad and sad memories... 

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Dearest Chloe,

It's been 4 years since I last held your tiny, fragile body in my arms. The memory of your little body wrapped up in the green towel will forever be etched in my mind.. and how much my heart was breaking when I reluctantly handed you back over to the nurse. This is a feeling that no parent should go through, but at the same time, the experience of it made me better mother today because I know the pain of loss.  

You have another new baby brother over 3 months ago (yup, another boy!!) and you will remain our only precious little princess. Oh how your daddy will dote on you if you are here today... how I'd love to shop for pretty frocks for you and braid your hair. 

Thinking of you and missing you, sweet princess.. Sending kisses to heaven.

With all our love,

Mummy (and Daddy too)

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Found this pic taken last month of little bun and my god-daughter! She is two-and-a half years old now and she just became a big sister last month. Both she and little bun were born in 2011 (she's born in Jan 2011 and little bun in Oct 2011) and coincidentally, their respective siblings are also born in the same year (exactly 8 weeks apart)!

Hoping that with the closeness in age, the 4 of them will grow up to be as close as siblings.

A colleague from Thailand gave little bun this cute Jim Thompson tee with a chubby elephant embroidered on the front when little bun was around 9 months old. Little bun was wearing it up till maybe he was around 16 months old when his head got a bit too big to fit through... otherwise, it still fitted him nicely.

I just realized recently that my mom let little bun #2 wear it and it ummmm.. was quite snug. Seriously..

1. Play with rubber duckie
2. Walk over to your little brother who is snoozing contentedly on his rocker
3. Leave rubber duckie on your little brother's chest and while making sure to wake him up in the process
4. Ensure that rubber duckie is sitting comfortably on little brother's chest
5. Walk away quickly
6. Little brother - "??!!!!!!!!!!"
7. Feign ignorance when mummy asks 'Who did this??"

Little bun had a play date with our neighbours upstairs.. Their little girl, Faith, is a couple of months older than little bun. She turned 2 years old on Monday and they invited us over for the cake cutting. Our 2 families have been hanging out quite a fair bit.. breakfast, dinner, etc. We get along pretty well with Faith's parents (same age group) and it's really nice that the kiddos can have play dates frequently (plus it is so convenient.. just a lift ride away!!). 

Faith's mummy recently found out that she is expecting and the baby will be due early next year, so it's kind of exciting that our little ones are all very close in age. Also, I know who I can pass on little bun #2's barely worn baby clothes to (since he had outgrown most of them before he's got a chance to wear them..). 

Little Bun is 20 Months Old!!

My cheeky champ is 20 months old today!! So far he's achieved the unachievable.. he has made his mummy a schizo!! This minute he makes me want to put him into the cupboard until his tantrums are over, and the next minute make me want to cover him with my kisses and hug him tight. I am at the crossroad where my head tells me to be a strict disciplinarian, but my heart goes all mushy and caves in when he looks at me with those innocent eyes. 

At the ripe old age of 20 months, he REALLY knows how to push the right buttons and get his way (and not feel a morsel of guilt). He makes me want to spank his bottoms this minute, and want to kiss his cheeks the next minute by simply calling me 'mama'. He says 'please' in the sweetest imaginable voice to get what he wants.. and his success rate hovers around 99%. 

Happy 20 Months, little bun.. Congratulations, you have successfully wrapped both daddy and mummy around your grimy, saliva coated fingers!!!

Lucas Lee - 5th Year Anniversary

It has been 5 long years. So much has happened in these 5 years, and it all began on 17 June 2008, the day we lost Lucas. That was the first big blow in my very sheltered life...  it caught me totally by surprise cos I never thought something bad like this would ever happen to me. Unfortunately, it did. And that was only the beginning. 

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Dear Lucas,

I am sure you already know this, but yes, you are a big brother again! Little Ayden is a little surprise addition to our family, and I guess it must've happened because God saw what a great brother you are watching over little bun, and therefore he gave you and Chloe another little brother to watch over. 

Daddy and I miss you so much. Earlier this month, mummy went to see a new client, Lucasfilm, and it brought a smile to my face. It was like a sign from you to remind me that you are still here.. I miss all the signs that you and Chloe used to give me (or maybe it's because I am just too preoccupied with your 2 little brothers these days to notice?). 

Wherever you may be now, do give me a sign whenever you are around. I miss you so much and have never stopped wondering "what if you are here today". I miss the times we would have shared if you weren't taken away so suddenly.

Missing you dearly.. loving you deeply.

Lots of love today and everyday,

Mummy (and Daddy too)

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Little bun went 'missing' one day and I eventually found him playing/ hiding beneath the baby cot!! Of all places to play, he chose a really weird (and dusty) spot!

Father's Day 2013

To celebrate Father's Day 2013, we (the 2 boys and I) gave Mark a 'priceless' gift. We gave him some time-off. Yup... this overworked daddy was given the evening off on Saturday to hang out with his friends (for the record, he only came home past 2am!!). Poor little bun was looking throughout the house for his darling papa all evening until he finally gave up and fell asleep reluctantly while watching Barney. 

Peek-a-booooo!!

Trying to take a decent pic of the 2 buns.. almost had a minor heart attack when Kyran started to poke at Ayden's eye. **gulp**

Little Bun #2 is 3 Months Old!!

My happy little sunshine turns 3 months old today!!! 

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To My Sweet little Ayden, 

Thank you for being the super sweet-natured and easy-going baby that you are. The last 3 months are a breeze because you are sooooo easy to care for. I am so grateful that you love your drink, burp sleep (repeat mode) routine!! You have recently started cooing and responding whenever we play with you, and you love to watch the world go by sitting in your rocker. Mommy loves waking up to your little toothless grin and I enjoy our special 'mommy and Ayden time' every morning before daddy and/or Kyran wakes up. (You make me want to roll you up and stuff you back into my belly just so I can have you all to myself!!). 

You have such a joyful presence and your Daddy, big brother and I (and not forgetting Huskee and Hershey too) loooooooooove you to the core.

Happy 3 Months, little one!

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Last Saturday was the little bun's last class for this term and there is a month long break before term 3 commences sometime in early July. He joined the term 2 class midway through as kids have to be above 18 months old before they can join.

Free-play Time

 

 Music & Dance Class

There was even a mini-graduation ceremony at the end of the class with the 'graduands', their parents and all the teachers!

Proud momma and her smiley bun!!

Love this photo of little bun and I.. he looks so matured and grown up here at 19 months old. Mama's darling bun.. 

Universal Studios Singapore (Trip 1)

Mark had one of his a spur of the moment bright idea to go to Universal Studios Singapore early one morning, and I think due to the lack of a good night's sleep, I went along with his plan (like alcohol, this is what sleep deprivation does to you.. don't say I didn't warn you!!). Oh, did I mention we bought ourselves annual passes too? Yup, us who do not like sunlight, humidity, the outdoors, rides, etc.. bought annual passes to a theme park (yes, once again, I blame sleep deprivation). Children below 4 goes in for free, so hooray to that.

Little bun #2 was dropped off at grandma's daycare (I had enough sanity left to not bring the little boy along because I know trying to handle both boys will be a mammoth challenge). 

Little bun spotted this Elmo from afar and started pointing (his 'best friends' are Barney and Elmo). We couldn't go for the ride because 'someone' didn't meet the minimum height requirement.

We left after 2 hours as little bun was getting cranky (nap time). Mark suggested that we should go back another day without the kids just to take the rides. Ummmm.. he can go for the rides, I will wait for him in the air conditioned comfort of the souvenir stores.  

This little boy is feeding well.. He went for his first round of vaccination (some 6 in 1 thingy) and had overall health check in late May. The first thing the paediatrician said when we walked into the room was "Whoaaaa.. he's doubled his birth weight!!" The nurses who administered the injection were asking if they could hold him because he 'looked like a teddy bear'. Uh huh... 

I am certainly not doing anything different with him.. I guess he just feeds and sleeps well generally. Easy-going and happy-go-lucky baby. 

Another week, another class!! 

This is his 3rd (or is it 4th??) time in the class. Compared to his first session, we can see that he is gaining confidence (i.e. walking around and checking things out), more interactive and beginning to enjoy himself. 

Little bun checking out the teacher/ piano during the music session.. He was standing beside the teacher and watching her for a while. Rather surprised that he did not disturb her because every time when I have my laptop out, he never fails to tap away at my keyboard! In fact, Mark (who accompanied him in the class) told me that the teacher was so taken by him she gave him kisses when she was done playing! 

Free play time that marks the end of class!

Little bun started 'talking' when just before he turn 1 year old. His first words were 'papa', 'bird', 'dog',  and 'ball'.. (in that order). Notice that 'mama' is not on the list??!!!. I have tried to keep track of the words in his vocab and this is what I have gathered at 19 months (may have missed out some):

1. Ah kong (grandpa)
2. Ah ma (maternal grandma)
3. Ah pak (uncle)
4. Airplane
5. Ayden
6. Baby
7. Bad dog
8. Ball 
9. Bang bang
10. Barney 
11. Bear
12. Beat beat
13. Bird
14. Birthday 
15. Bus
16. Bye
17. Car
18. Cat
19. Change 
20. Che Che (big sister)
21. Close
22. Cold
23. Come
24. Con (air con)
25. Dog
26. Down 
27. Duck
28. Elmo
29. Eyes
30. Fan
31. Finish 
32. Flower 
33. Fox
34. Hershey
35. Hi
36. Hold hand
37. Horse
38. Hot
39. iPad 
40. Kor kor (big brother)
41. Mama 
42. Mouse
43. Mum mum (food)
44. No
45. No more 
46. Open
47. Pain pain
48. Panda 
49. Papa 
50. Pat pat
51. Please
52. Por por (paternal grandma)
53. Press
54. Put back
55. Quick
56. Shoe
57. Sit
58. Snake
59. Socks
60. Scared
61. Star
62. Thanks
63. There
64. Touch
65. Uncle
66. Up
67. Wait
68. Where
69. Yee Yee (auntie)
70. Yes

On Mother's Day, dear Dr Anu sent me this text message to wish me 'Happy Mother's Day'! Was pleasantly surprised and touched.. Just told Mark that I actually miss seeing her!! In the past 3 years, I have been seeing her soooo regularly that she has somehow become part of my life. I am just so grateful that she came into my life 3 years ago after we lost Chloe. She gave me hope and she brought me joy.

I LOVE my boys.. Now I cannot imagine living life without them. If we had given up after all the setbacks, these two boys wouldn't be here today. What a scary thought!! They have brought meaning back into my life and looking at them makes me feel like I am the luckiest woman on earth!!

The two buns chilling together after their baths.. 

In the midst of all the mayhem in May, little bun attended his very first parent-accompanied playgroup session now that he's over 18 months old. It is going to be a 2 hour a week thing and little bun's doting father had been appointed to accompany him cos his long-suffering mother has no energy for all the activities. 

This playgroup is meant for kids between 18 months to 3 years old and little bun is the youngest in the class. I think there are around 12 kids with 4 teachers in each class... 2 for English and 2 for Mandarin. When little bun #2 reaches 18 months, I don't know how we are going to afford to send both of them there cos it is freaking expensive in my personal opinion. Poor momma and papa may have to get second jobs soon.. **boo hoo**