I brought some work home (again) to complete and I had my trusty sidekick 'helping' me out. Unfortunately while I was busy taking these cute photos, little bun deleted some information on the slides which I had been working on!! I had to redo some parts but good thing it wasn't a lot.

Little bun: "Momma, your laptop is nom nom nom..."

Yum yum yum... I have tasty feeties!!

Mother's Day 2012

Celebrating my very first 'Mother's Day' as a 'real' mother.. I have waited too freaking long for this day. Waaaay too freaking long.

On this special day, I'm just going to relax and enjoy every single minute with little bun, and I know that my Angels are with me too. Finally, for the first time in many years, this Mother's Day is without pain and tears.

I sent Dr Anu a card earlier this week.. It's a 'thinking of you on Mother's Day' kind of card. I didn't write much, just a short and simple note that we are thinking of her and most importantly, thank her for giving me a reason to celebrate this year's Mother's Day. Just received a text message from her wishing me 'Happy Mother's Day'!

Off to write the card that I got for my mom before we go over to her place for dinner. I also got her a card on behalf of little bun. This will be the very first card she receives from little bun and I'm sure she'll be stoked!! She's as proud a Grandma as I am as a mom.

My precious and I hanging out at some coffee joint in town. Yes, I know he looks nothing like me and everything like his daddy.. (BOO!!).

Just look at that serious little expression on his face.. I love my little bun so much... **blissful sigh**.

Nom..nom..nom...

Little bun having fun and enjoying his lunch of pureed pumpkin!! He makes a terrible mess everytime but he seems to be having such a good time I try to overlook the mess. Thank goodness for the plastic bib with 'catchment' cos it saved me from washing a lot of clothes.

Liquid Gold --- Part 2

Anyway, I am very glad I invested the time and effort to investigate before I make any hasty decision due to peer pressure. I have gained a lot of insight into this breastmilk versus formula milk debate and while I don't think there is a 'right' or 'wrong' answer, I am consoled and convinced by the confirmation that exclusively breastfed babies tend to be leaner than their formula fed counterparts. The knowledge that I have gained is too vast to be shared here but the below sites provide a very good summary.

• http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4236229.stm
• http://www.breastfeedingmums.com/dr_jack_newman_slow_weight_gain.htm
• http://kellymom.com/health/growth/growthcharts/#charts

I am glad what I have been doing for little bun hasn't been in vain. Giving him breastmilk when I am a full time stay at home mom is fine, but trying to keep it going when I start working hasn't been the easiest thing to do. Ever since I have started working 3 days a week, I continued to express my breastmilk every 4 hours in the office. It wasn't easy because there is no proper nursing room in my office and in the building, plus everyday I have to bring all the necessary equipment to and fro.. the pump, the parts, the ice packs, etc. For the first few days, I actually did it in the restroom but I didn't like the thought of germs in the air contaminating my precious milk! Subsequently, I found a spare room (with see through glass) where I could do it behind the safety and privacy of... **insert drumbroll**... an opened cupboard door which shielded me from the rest of the office which had a healthy male population. It was rather awkward initially but I have since gotten used to it (and so have all my colleagues). They stopped asking me why I was hiding behind the cupboard door twice a day.

My conclusion is, I will continue to give little bun breastmilk for as long as I can (crossing fingers for no long business trips) and as long as I am still able to churn it out. Research indicated that formula fed babies gain more weight because cows' milk are not as easily digested/ broken down by babies as compared to breastmilk, and are therefore stored in the body as fats. Breastmilk is still the best source of food for babies for the first 6 months of their lives, and even better if it can be given until they reach 1 year old (mixed with semi-solids of course). Yes, babies on breastmilk are leaner and not as chubby as formula fed babies, but so long as little bun is not underweight and is thriving well, I have fine with my 'skinny' baby.

That said, I am going to adopt a more relaxed approach... should my body call it quits and stop producing milk or when the day comes when I don't produce enough to feed my baby, I will not hesitate to switch over to formula milk - without feeling guilty.

Little Bun's 1st Masterpiece (??)

This piece of abstract work was done by little bun on Mark's iPad. Basically no 'drawing' was needed.. just a few random swipes here and there with his little fingers. Well, I may love my son more than anything in the world, but I am not THAT disillusioned to think of this as a 'masterpiece'. Hehehehee..

Ok but since this is MY blog and I am an (overly) proud mother, I think little bun's first stab at drawing is a commendable effort! Plus you have to take into consideration his parents' drawings are abysmal.

Well done, my son... Mommy is soooooo very proud of you! (Hmmm... should I have it printed and framed?).

Liquid Gold --- Part 1

Recently, I was asked to put together an updated CV for work purposes and I got stuck at the bit where I had to list all my 'achievements' (this CV is something  that my employer uses to 'sell' me to potential clients). It took me a lot of time trying to come up with the things that I'd achieved work-wise during my 10 years in the workforce. I think it'd take me even longer to come up with the 'achievements' in my personal life. When time comes for me to have my one-to-one lifetime 'review' with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates (that is provided that I go to Heaven), I think I'd need even more time to list what I have achieved in my lifetime.

Undoubtedly, one of my key achievements is having little bun... plus how I have managed to reach my personal goal in keeping him exclusively on breastmilk  for the first 6 months of his life (as recommended by pediatricians).  I didn't think I'd be able to achieve it though I had maintained the 'I will breastfeed him for as long as I am able to'. Thankfully my body didn't quit on me and slightly more than 6 months later, I am still keeping up with it. While I don't produce surplus of that 'liquid gold' to feed a small starving nation (like how I read some mothers do), I make just enough (with a little spare) to cover the needs of little bun.

However recently I have been rather bothered by pressure from outside and within. My mom had commented a number of times that a neighbour's baby boy who is about a month older than little bun but he is way bigger/ chunkier/ meatier. Mom also found out that he was fed solely on formula milk. (Literature supports the finding that formula fed babies tend to gain weight quicker than exclusively breastfed babies, especially after the baby's 3rd month). I think it's the 'guilt' that's bothering me cos I don't know if  my insistence to keep little bun on an exclusive breastmilk diet had led to him not having enough nutrients and thus putting on less weight.

Anyway I don't think my mom is trying to tell me anything, but it certainly made me wonder if I am underfeeding my little boy. I have also had friends with young babies around little bun's age and they seem to be more robust looking. So the pressure is on. For the record, little bun is certainly not underweight and according to the pediatrician during little bun's last check-up in the end of Mar, little bun is right smack in the centre of both the length (height) and weight growth charts for his age. There also seems to be this notion that a chubby baby = healthy (ier?) baby.

Being the worry wart that I am, paranoia set in. I am the kind of mother who worries about anything and everything. Examples: If little bun is sleeping more, I'd worry that he's snoozing more cos he isn't well. If he doesn't poo on a particular day, I'd worry about constipation and if he poos more than usual on a certain day, I worry about diarrhea. I notice every minute detail in/on little bun.. if he so much as sneezes/ coughs/ scratches himself, I'd be on a hawk-eyed watch. You get the drift? (**insert wry grin**)

I spent the past few days (and nights) religiously reading and reviewing literature on this topic (breastmilk versus formula milk). I was prepared to either  (1) Introduce formula milk into little bun's diet by putting him on a part formula, part breastmilk diet (plus his semi-solid food too   (2) Do away with breastmilk completely.

.. to be cont'd...

"Maaaa" is for...

Since Sunday Mark and I had noticed that little bun has been making a sound repeatedly, and it sounds like "maaaaa". I am convinced that my efforts in teaching him to say 'mummy' has paid off.."Maaaa" is the first syllable in 'mummy' right? Before I had the chance to rejoice, Mark corrected me. He said that little bun's "maaaaa" is actually the prelude to 'Mark'! (As in "Maaaaaaark").

Awwwww-right... whatever.

Back to work today... but at least this is a very short week for me (only 1 work day!!) because of 2 public holidays coupled with the fact that I don't work on Mondays and Fridays. Additionally, I have taken Thursday off as my mom had to go for a medical appointment, hence couldn't take care of little bun. I don't mind at all cos I need every excuse I can get to spend time at home with him (ermm.. does this make me a bad employee from my employer's perspective?).

It's so hard to drag myself away from the 'smiling magnet' that is my son... When I am away from him, I miss his unique scent. It's almost like a drug... almost... I love to smell his head as much as I love to smell the paw pads of Huskee and Hershey. Yes, I do like to smell the paw pads of my doggies.