The Last Day to a Fantastic Year...

In the blink of the eye, we are now at the last day of 2012. This year has been one of the best years of my thirty-(*bleep*) years of life. Never have I been more sleep-deprived, but at the same time, never have I felt more fulfilled. This is my first full year of being embraced in the loving arms of 'Motherhood', something which had been eluding me for the past 4 years. 

I will bid 'Adieu' to 2012 with much fondness in my heart. It has been an extremely kind and rewarding year, a HUGE difference what I have been through the last 4 years. Mark and I have been extremely blessed once again with another 'bun-in-the-baking'.. it came as a complete surprise but a surprise that is warmly received with open arms nevertheless. My wish for the New Year is for little bun #2 will continue to 'bake away' and arrive healthy into our family; and for my little bun will continue to thrive and grow and bring smiles into our lives.

Farewell 2012, I will always look back with beautiful memories... And to 2013, a warm welcome!!

"Hello hello"

Playing with the new toy he received from his Godma for Christmas, mimicking us when we are on the phone! 

Breakfast with Santa-Bun!

Yes, I was supposed to be on bed rest but we sneaked out on Christmas morning for a family breakfast!! Little bun garnered much smiles and attention from passers-by with his little Santa outfit (got to make the money we spent on it worthwhile by maximising its usage!!).

A Worn Out Santa-Bun

Poor little Santa-Bun must have been so worn out by all the activities on Christmas Eve. He dozed off in my arms while we were on our way out for Christmas Day breakfast!!

Hmmm... it is an emo day today. Now that all the hype and festivities of Christmas have subsided, there is this hollow feeling inside. I miss my Angels.. I wonder where and how they are. I wonder if they were with us when we had our Christmas dinner at home. 

Merry Christmas, Darling (s).

Little Bun's 2nd Christmas

This picture was taken last Christmas when little bun was just a wee bun, totally unaware of his surroundings and being carried around in our arms all the time. 

Christmas 2011

Can't believe a year have flown pass and this is little bun's second Christmas with us. He has grown so much and is now wanting to crawl/ cruise around, although he still loves being carried by daddy.

Christmas 2012

This year, instead of going over to our friend's place (which is the usual practice), we decided to have a cosy and small (and I do mean small) dinner party at home with my sis and a few close friends since I am still supposed to be on bed-rest. Mark and I also prefer the company of a few close friends rather than be in the company of a large crowd. I think that's what age does to one.. you become more selective of the people you want to spend your time with. 

Menu for the night:

1. Roast Pork Knuckle
2. Roast Rosemary Chicken
3. Honey Baked Ham
4. Mixed Sausage Platter
5. Baked Potato
6. Garden Salad
7. Log Cake

It's Christmas Day!!

Little Bun #2 (Part II)

Dr Anu has been keeping an eagle eye on me (my cervical length to be exact) from the start of the pregnancy because of what happened during my last pregnancy with little bun. As expected, my cervix started shortening rather suddenly and quickly during the last scan and Dr Anu called for an immediate cerclage the following morning (!!!).

Although I have gone through it not too long ago when I was expecting little bun, I was still a bit worried about the surgery and it's associated risks. Anyway a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. Just have to bite the bullet and go with the flow.. if I can do it once, I am sure I can do it once more!!! 

So yup, I have just done the cerclage and stayed 3 nights in hospital. When the GA was wearing out while I was still in the recovery room, the cramping/ contractions was horrendous (much worse than the previous time from my memory) and the doctor had to give me an injection of painkiller. Oh yes, before I forget, the anaesthetist who did the GA for me must have a great dislike for me... I was jabbed 3 (freaking) times before he managed to insert the needle/plug. I am still badly bruised at those 'failed sites' and it hurt like crazy!! I swear he hit my bone.. seriously.  

I missed my lttle bun like crazy during those few nights where I couldn't sleep beside him. So glad to be back home finally, but for the next few weeks, it's bed-rest for me. 

So, who says my son doesn't look like me and only takes after his daddy? I have found photographic proof to show that he does look like his mommy too! Very much in fact!! 

I found my photo at my parent's place over the weekend when I went for dinner. It didn't occur to me just how much we looked alike, including that same gaze expression. Note those pursed lips too! **happy dance**

Little Bun #2 (Part 1)

So here we go again... Little bun is going to be a big brother (yup yup!!). Somehow I have gone from what doctors classify as 'sub-fertile' to being very fertile after giving birth to little bun. According to Dr Anu, when I was expecting little bun, he must have 'fixed' a few things inside! HAHAHA... he is my little 'handyman'!! While Mark and I were absolutely stunned by the discovery, we are nonetheless stoked and uber pleased that little bun is going to have a sibling to grow up with. 

How did I make this discovery? It started with some weird symptoms which I never had while expecting little bun... symptoms like sudden episodes of dizziness (which is still on-going), retching, things started to taste strange... Initially I put it down to a case of stomach flu (and my company doctor actually diagnosed my dizzy spells to 'vertigo' (???!!). The company doctor gave me a cocktail of drugs and I guess my instinct must have kicked in, so I decided to take a home pregnancy test before I started popping any pills into my mouth. Viola!! 2 clear lines appeared.. Sent Mark out to buy another kit cos it seemed rather absurd and unbelievable.. He bought a digital one and the words 'Pregnant' appeared. 

I have learnt a few very important medical facts through this:

1. The old wives tale of it being almost 'impossible' to get pregnant while one is breastfeeding is NOT true.  
2. You can get pregnant even if you have not had a single period after your last pregnancy.
3. Women with PCOS can conceive naturally.

Still find it rather hard to comprehend how we (freaking) long and how (absurdly) much money we poured into fertility treatments before we finally had little bun, and now this baby (whom I shall name **drumroll** 'little bun #2' henceforth) came so naturally and easily!!  

Anyhow we aren't going to take this for granted and we have started on the usual routine of weekly scans and check-ups once we found out. Dr Anu was just as surprised as we were when we went to see her but she thinks that from a medical perspective, is a good thing to have the 2 babies so close together.  

** Announcement **

Little bun turns 14 months old today and he's got an announcement to make!!

I love weekends and look forward to them cos I get to spend quality time with my boys. Even doing something as simple and mundane as sitting there watching little bun play can be so happy and fulfilling. Simple pleasures are priceless treasures indeed!

"C'mon, play with me, mama!"

My poor little bun had a little accident at home on Friday night. He was happily crawling around the house on and somehow one of his elbows buckled under him. He fell face first onto the marble floor and his teeth cut into his upper lip. Poor little bun had a puffy, bleeding upper lip and to make matters worse, Mark wasn't at home to soothe him. It took me a looong time to calm him down and to have a chance to check out the 'damage'... fortunately, he didn't chip any of his teeth, but there was a rather long gash on his upper lip.

Cannot get enough of watching little bun sound asleep... He is taking up A LOT more space than before with his kung-fu style sleeping positions, and we keep getting remarks from people telling us it's about time we let him sleep in his own cot/ room. However I still cannot bear let him sleep anywhere else but beside me.. yes, I am a needy mother!! I still enjoy waking up in the middle of the night and seeing/ smelling/ touching him, knowing that he is here for real and it's not just a dream. 

Gucci Gucci Gooooo....

We were out Christmas shopping and saw that there was a sale at Gucci, so without a word, Mark was drawn into the boutique like a moth to a flame. We wanted to get a cute pair of toddler shoes for little bun but unfortunately they didn't carry his size in this particular shop. During our time in the shop, little bun was mesmerizing  the sales ladies with his very impish smile  (he was in a very good mood at that time) and they all saying how cute he was. I wanted to tell them "just wait till you see his cranky side..", but like how any devoted mother would, I zipped by lips and smiled dotingly at my little boy (while ensuring that he didn't make a nuisance of himself as the shop was pretty crowded). 

Now you see me...

.. and now you don't!!

My mama's favourite flowers!

Little bun is so attached to his daddy these days!! Yes I am jealous, very, very jealous indeed of the bond between those two. Mark was taking a shower and little bun crawled his way outside the toilet and was fussing for his daddy.. In the last photo, he was putting his head on the floor to try and peep between the gap to see where his daddy was!

All these while I was standing behind him and he wasn't the least interested in me. Going off to nurse my very bruised ego...

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree...

Since 2008, Mark had been asking to have a Christmas tree at home. Unfortunately this 'wish' of his did not materialize because I didn't see any reason why we should have a tree at home when there's only the 2 of us (plus Hershey) staring at it (probably without much enthusiasm and appreciation on my part too). Somewhere along the years of us trying  for (and losing) babies, Mark vowed that once we have our baby, he will get a tree regardless of what I think. (Frankly, I was concerned about the lack of space in our pigeon-hole sized apartment, PLUS the space to store the tree and all the ornaments for the remaining 11 months). I'd also much prefer a real tree cos I love the scent, BUT I don't want the part of cleaning up after the fallen pine needles..

2008 - This is the year we moved into the new place and also the year we lost Lucas. Definitely weren't in the mood to celebrate after such a devastating loss.

2009 - We lost Chloe  the following year, so we weren't in the mood for any celebration yet again, especially since after 2 consecutive losses within a year of each other. 

2010 - We lost yet another pregnancy in Nov, and life was at its bleakest and darkest at this stage... 3 consecutive losses in the same number of years. Celebrate?? Nahhh... Couldn't be further from it.

2011 - Little bun came into our lives and swept us all in a whirlwind of 'Bun-related activities". It was a year which we finally have a reason to celebrate, but we were so mesmerized and caught up with every 'goo' and 'gaaa' that he makes that we had no time for anything else.  

2012 - Mark finally went ahead and got the tree  that he so wanted (behind my back, if I may add) after promising me that he will clear up our store room so that we have space to keep the faux tree when the fun part is over.  

We spent a large part of Saturday afternoon setting up the tree (AFTER Mark cleared the store room of unwanted stuff) and I admit I had fun putting up the decorations together with him. Little bun took the 'supervisory role' and watched us from the safety of his play yard. I can't wait for next year when little bun will be able to be more involved in putting up the decorations together with me. I was totally knackered at the end of it and could barely straighten my back, but seeing the look of childish delight in my husband's eyes and the look of curiosity and bewilderment in my son's eyes at the blinking lights, it was so worth it. 

(Just not looking forward to having to take down all those decorations when the fun is over.. uhhhh..)

                                                                                                                                   

There's been too many pesky mozzies in the house lately and my poor little bun is getting the brunt of it. No amount of mosquito patches seem to be able to deter the mozzies from sucking the blood of my precious baby!! Grrrr... Unfortunately, little bun seems to react rather badly to mozzie bites and the bites take a loooooong time to heal plus leave a little scar. I HATE MOSQUITOES!!

My 2 'caged' boys!! Both are not looking very pleased... hehehe...

Brought my Christmas decorations out from their respective hiding places over the weekend. I was happy to see my 2 favourite pieces of tea lights, namely 'Hope' and 'Joy' after they have been kept away for the past 11 months. 

Christmas is just around the corner and 2012 is coming to and end!!! Where did the past 11 months go? 

Little bun's Godma gave him an ultra cute panda T-shirt complete with flashing lights!! The silly boy was trying to 'catch' the lights when I put the T-shirt on him to try.