I bought little bun a set of board books (hoping to instill a love for reading) in him from young. The first one I handed him was the one on 'Pets', and he immediately flipped to the page on dogs!! He stared at the pictures for a while before getting bored and decided that the book may taste better than it looks. Hmmmm...

Mark sent this photo to me on one of the nights which I was working overtime in the office. Made my heart go 'awwww'... and made me question myself. What the f*ck was I doing in the office when my son was waiting for me back at home???!!!!

Barely 2.5 months into starting work, I am already planning my 'retirement'. How can I have the best of both worlds, i.e. spend every moment with little bun and yet be financially independent and be able to save up for his future?

There is something I really love about this seemingly random photo. I love how soundly my little baby is sleeping (after one of our weekend shopping mall jaunts). Most of all, I love how he rested his hand on me..  I was holding onto him and he in turn, was holding onto me.

During the few days when I was away in Bangkok for my business trip, Mark and I did a few video calls. Little bun was grinning away when he heard/ saw me on the screen... Technology is a double-edged sword cos on one hand, I was so happy to see my little boy but on the other hand, seeing him 'there' without me made me sad (and guilty). 

  

What annoyed and saddened me most was during the 4 days that I was away, little bun learnt to sit without support!!! I missed this milestone... and truth be told, if I continue to work, there'd be more milestones that I'd miss out on. His first crawl, first step, etc...

It's been a super crazy week at work. Feeling helpless and breathless. Here's the current state of my life in 3 short sentences...

"At work, you think of the child you have left at home. At home, you think of the work you've left unfinished. Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself. Your heart is rent." - Golda Meir.

Little bun and his BFF

It never fails to warm my heart to see how gentle Hershey is with little bun. Sometimes her affections are a one-sided affair, but she certainly doesn't give up! I hope these 2 will continue to 'live in harmony'!!

Missing My Boys...

It feels soooooo wrong to go to bed without little bun tucked snugly into my side and letting his unqiue, sweet baby smell lull me to sleep. It also feels sooooo wrong to wake up in the morning without looking at his gummy grin.

Counting down the hours till I get back home to my husband and son. Missing my 2 boys like crazy!!!

(Mental note to self - No more business trips, no matter how short it is!!) 

Home Is Where The Heart Is

I don't quite know how it happened and what posessed me to agree to it (I guess I could've been on a high from chocolates)... I will be going away on my first business trip since starting work last month. I thought I'd be able to avoid travelling at least for the rest of this year until little bun is bigger, but little did I know that it'd happen less than 2 months after I start (part-time) work!! Ok, on my 2nd week back at work, I managed to wriggle my way out of a long haul (heaven forbid!!) trip, so maybe this is a compromise on my part.

It's only going to be a short 4 day trip.. was supposed to be 5 days but I opted to fly back on the night after the meeting ends. It's going to be a mad dash to the airport in rush hour Bangkok traffic. Although I will only arrive at midnight and get home at an ungodly hour where little bun will most definitely be asleep, I'd rather be at home than anywhere else.

I am planning to continue to express my milk, freeze it and bring it home with me. Admittedly, it's a rather ambitious plan on my part but I just cannot bear to toss the 'liquid gold' into the sewers!! I will be bringing a small ice box with numerous ice packs with me. I need luck.. lots of it!! Hopefully I can bring them back in good condition.

In the card that little bun gave to my mom, I traced his palm print on the card.. I quite like the idea of doing a palm and/ or foot print of little bun in all the future cards that he gives to his grandparents. It's a nice way to keep a record of his growth. In hindsight, I should have done it for him on a monthly basis from his first month onwards and keep it as a momento for myself. It's very simple really, all it requires is pencil and paper (plus someone to hold little bun and press his palm/foot onto  the paper)!

Little Bun is 7 Months Old!!

Yet another month had flown by and little bun is already 7 months old!! The past month felt like it's gone in a flash.. maybe it's because now that I have started working 3 days a week, time seems to pass quicker. 7 months ago, I carried a teeny-tiny newborn in my arms... now my teeny-tiny baby is a sturdy and active baby (and also very 'talkative'.. he can't talk yet but he sure can make hell a lot of loud babbling!!) who smiles at me every morning when he wakes up every morning, and who giggles hysterically when all I have to do is say 'hi' and smile at him.

Mark and I are soooo lucky that overall, little bun is a very happy, smiley and easy-going child. He is the ray of sunshine in our lives and what a pleasure it is to be in his company. Nowadays when Mark and I go out, it no longer feels 'right' when it's just the two of us. Although it can be quite cumbersome bringing little bun out with us everytime (because of all the stuff which we need to pack and lug around, e.g. the stroller, milk, diapers, wet wipes, dry tissue, hankies, extra sets of clothings, bibs, booties, toys, etc), we'd rather put up with the hassle than be without him. Mark and I also realized that we hardly get to hold hands anymore cos our hands are usually 'occupied'. One of us will be holding little bun while the other will be holding onto his diaper bag. Looking forward to when he is bigger and starts walking... it'd be so nice to hold his little hands as he toddles between us.

(For the record, 7 months on and still breastfeeding!!)