Mark and I had a drink at a nice fancy place on the eve of my birthday with little bun in tow. Little bun was in a cheery mood and was busy entertaining himself in the new environment while we were just sitting back watching him and ensuring he does not get up to any mischief. Mark then asked me quietly between sips of his wine - "Do you realize there's a good chance he might not have been here today? Can you imagine how our life would be without him?".
Mark is right.. we were soooooo close to not having little bun (and little bun #2) in our lives. Life would've been vastly different then. Our house would still be spick and span and our bank accounts would have been a much 'healthier' condition than the state it is in now. I'd also have a lot more wardrobe space to store my clothes/ bags (the 2 buns have a rapidly growing wardrobe which I have to make space for by clearing out my stuff). We'd have all the time in the world for travelling, eating at fancy restaurants and catching up with friends. We'd also have been holding hands a lot more (now with the 2 boys in our lives, Mark is usually holding little bun while I am holding little bun #2, so there's hardly any chance for us to hold hands anymore). When we do go out, I have to trade in my lovely handbags for a huge diaper bag. Usually, when I step out of the house, my hair would still be wet and all over the place.
Mark is right.. we were soooooo close to not having little bun (and little bun #2) in our lives. Life would've been vastly different then. Our house would still be spick and span and our bank accounts would have been a much 'healthier' condition than the state it is in now. I'd also have a lot more wardrobe space to store my clothes/ bags (the 2 buns have a rapidly growing wardrobe which I have to make space for by clearing out my stuff). We'd have all the time in the world for travelling, eating at fancy restaurants and catching up with friends. We'd also have been holding hands a lot more (now with the 2 boys in our lives, Mark is usually holding little bun while I am holding little bun #2, so there's hardly any chance for us to hold hands anymore). When we do go out, I have to trade in my lovely handbags for a huge diaper bag. Usually, when I step out of the house, my hair would still be wet and all over the place.
These days, the only place we go to are our regular jaunts which we know are kid friendly and where the service staff know us.. We hardly venture to anywhere new anymore. We rarely meet up with friends or invite friends over to our place for dinner for a very long time (we used to host regular hot pots or BBQ sessions at home 'pre-buns'). We haven't been in a cinema for over 2 years (and counting), and our favorite movie at home now is Shrek.
I wouldn't trade my current life for anything in the world. The mere thought of not having little bun in my life is enough to bring tears to my eyes. This little boy has patched up my broken heart and turned my life around. He is why I am here today.
Recently I have been making him say 'I love you' to me before I leave for the office, and he says it in that cute, incomprehensible way of his that sounds more like 'arr-roof-ooo'.
I love those mischievous expressions of his when he knows I am trying to take a photo (see below photos); the cute way he grabs onto my leg like a koala and asks me to carry him; the way he seeks for my hand and holds onto it when we are in the car; the funny way he sleeps at night (ass in the air); the way he wriggles his little fingers at me to ask for his favorite pillow just before he goes to sleep...
This birthday, I am giving thanks for what I have in my life today, and especially to my Angels for watching over me. There's nothing more I can ask for with a loving husband and the 2 boys in my life. Miraculously, I have also achieved my personal goal of becoming a mother before I turn 36 years old.. in fact, I exceeded it by becoming a mother of 2!
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