In one of my earlier post not too long ago, I mentioned a friend who finally conceived a pair of twins through multiple tries at IVF. She just sent me a heartbreaking message that when she went for her routine check-up this morning, the doctor only detected one heartbeat. My poor friend is heartbroken... she is crying non-stop for the unborn life that was snuffed out too early.

I made sure that I didn't give her any of the so-called 'advice' that I received before, which hurt me more than helped me.. i.e. 'things happen for a reason', 'time heals all wounds' etc. I simply let her know that I care a lot about her, and that if she needs a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear, I am available at all hours of the day (the perks of being jobless!). Also reminded her that she should now take even better care of the other little life whose heartbeat is still pulsating. I really hope the miscarriage will not affect the surviving twin.. but since it is fraternal twins, it should be fine **fingers crossed**.

Sigh... very affected by this news. It reminded me too much of my own painful losses and I can feel that familiar wrenching feeling in my heart. Praying hard for the well-being of the remaining baby..

As I type this out, I am looking at little bun sleeping peacefully beside me, counting my blessings and thanking God for the greatest gift of all. At the same time, my eyes are hot with unshed tears... I am missing my Angels.

Clearly I'm no longer the número uno on my husband's life. I'm more like an after thought... Or perhaps simply 'the one who does the ironing' (this role changes depending on the day of the week or the time of the day). It could also be 'the one who makes dinner', 'the one who feeds his son', 'the one who cleans the bathrooms', 'the one who prepares Hershey's meals', 'the one who does the laundry', etc.

Sigh...

Little bun gave my mom and I a heart attack the other day. He was lying in his cot and self amusing while my mom was sitting beside his bed watching telly. My mom suddenly screamed for me (I, the long-suffering housewife, was ironing hubby's clothes) that there's "blood in his ear"!! I dashed to his side and indeed, there was a pool of fresh blood pooled at the fossa section of his ear.. my heart skipped a beat (maybe two.. or three.. perhaps even four??!).

Thankfully, although it bled quite a bit, it was from an external wound. My mom kept asking me if it was from inside his ear, but after a thorough check, Dr Shane confirmed that his ear canal was dry and there's not a trace of blood. The only explanation I have is somehow, little bun managed to scratch himself with his fingernails as I could see a tiny cut. Who would've guessed a small wound like that can bleed so much??!

Off to trim some tiny nails...

Little Bun is 4 Months Old!!

Little bun is 4 months old today. He marked this special day by reaching yet another milestone, he can now roll over from his back onto his stomach unaided! He is pleased as punch with his newly acquired skill and keeps practicing it even when he is half asleep (last night Mark and I watched him execute the maneuver while he was semi-asleep with his eyes half closed. Our cute little bun never fails to baffle and amuse us with his antics!

Some of the nights as I lay beside my sleeping child, I still find it so hard to believe that I successfully carried him in my womb for 37 weeks and he belongs to me. Ok, ok, he belongs to 'us'. Mark never fails to correct me when I refer to little bun as 'my son'.. He is 'our son', happy??!). Many times I have drifted off to dreamland by staring at his beautiful face or by gently stroking his chubby cheek. As little bun now sleeps between Mark and I (so much for investing in an expensive baby cot!!), we can no longer hold hands when we sleep, as was our usual practice. However I have found myself a (even better) replacement.. I have begun letting little bun grab hold of my finger during bedtime!

I love him so much I think my heart is going to explode.

My son MUST love me a lot... he gave me a 'love bite'/ hickey on my arm. :)

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Happy Valentine's Day to my darling hubby... there's no time to make you a special dinner this year, but I know you wouldn't mind it one single bit because looking at little bun every single day is a gift itself.

14 years ago, I was 'attacked' by a chubby toddler armed with a bow and arrow.. His arrow hit me and I soon started noticing and falling for this guy who stays next door who keeps buying me food, flowers and strawberry milk (??). Although you are still buying me food (often) and flowers (rarely **hint**) I am glad you have stopped buying me strawberry milk (I still don't like it).

Love you sooooo much... I am blessed to be in a relationship where I get to fall in love over and over again with the same person who is my husband!!

** Psst.. I ironed all your clothes today... There were 8 business shirts, 4 pants, 2 polo tops and 4 T-shirts. That's my Valentine's Day gift to you!! **

I really like this photo that was taken recently.. it'd have been ideal if Huskee is also in it. Then again, I don't think he'll appreciate/tolerate being squished so close to Hershey while we try to fit everyone into the frame. (and it'd be good if I have longer arms.. as in REALLY long)