I spent part of the morning 'hiding' some friends from my Facebook newsfeed at the advice of Mark so that I won't see any of their status updates and photo notifications if they post new pictures. After my post yesterday about my colleague's status update on Facebook, I found out last night that a friend's wife had just give birth over the weekend and he had posted up pictures of his newborn just like any proud daddy would.
I know, I know, I should NOT have clicked on the pictures but I was somehow drawn to it like a moth to an open flame. I couldn't help myself... so yes, I looked at the cute newborn pics of my friend's son. He has his daddy's eyes... Isn't it intriguing how this product of love created by 2 individuals will go on to carry the traits and characteristics of each parent? This is something that I desparately long to see in my 'creation' with Mark.
Lucas was only 14 weeks into gestation when I lost him so unfortunately we couldn't really tell whose features he got. As for Chloe, when I first saw her I felt that she resembled Mark a lot, but last night when I went to look at the photos that we had of her, she reminded me so much of myself... especially her lips. Chloe's lips are definitely from her grandpapa and her mummy. They are what my maid used to call 'kissable lips' cos it's thick and full. Sadly, Chloe's kissable lips will never get to give her daddy and mummy sticky, chocolate coated kisses ... Her lips will not get to kiss Huskee's curly fur and Hershey's glossy coat... She will not experience butterflies in her stomach when she gives her first kiss to a boy (with her overprotective dad lurking in the shadows with baseball bat in hand)... She will not get to kiss her own baby when she becomes a mummy of her own.
Well I certainly hope my friend's won't be offended if/ when they find out that I have 'hidden' them (hopfully they won't ever find out)... it's not them, it's just me. Basically I have 'hidden' anyone who has a young infant or anyone who is due to give birth soon so that I can avoid getting myself depressed if they post something up on Facebook. This is not a long term solution and I know I cannot avoid forever but well, I need to take it one step at a time I guess.
** Chloe... mummy is thinking of you and missing you so darn much as your due date draws nearer. Are you thinking of me and missing me too?
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