I was chatting with my aunty yesterday when I visited my uncle in hospital (he was admitted back in for low blood pressure) and my aunty casually mentioned to me that my mom's been pretty bored at home with not much things to do after her retirement in July. I felt soooooo guilty when I heard this because the ONLY reason why my mom decided to retire was because per our original plans, she'd take a 'break' for 3 months after she retires in July, and when October comes, she'd help me with Chloe once she's born and also look after me during my confinement period. My mom will then continue to take care of Chloe after I finish my maternity leave and go back to work.
My mom had been in the workforce for the past 35 odd years, and she always likes to keep herself busy. Now that she is at home everyday and there is no grandchild for her to care for, she has been bored stiff. I guess the 'grandson' she is looking after now is my little Huskee, and she had also been trying to keep herself busy by sewing a new bed for her 'granddaughter' Hershey.
If only I didn't miscarry, my mom would have been happily (and busily) looking after grandchild. Chloe would have brought so much joy into her grandparents' lives... she would have brought so much laughter into our family... she'd be the gem in her grandparents' eyes. I just feel like I have not only short-changed my husband, I have also short-changed my parents... And at the end of it all, I feel like I have been short-changed by God.
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