To my Dearest Daughter - Chloe,
14 October,was supposed to have been your EDD, and it should have been your first birthday today. Unfortunately, Mummy brought you into this world 16 weeks too early and your date of birth/ date of death became 26 June.
How I dearly wish that today is a day filled with joy and much laughter, rather than feeling the pain, dread and gloom. How I wish Daddy and Mummy can take you and little Lucas to a toy store and let you pick out any toy that catches your fancy. How I wish I can buy you a birthday cake in pretty pink. How I wish I can hold your tiny hands, kiss your cheeks and sit you on my lap; one lap for you, the other lap for Lucas. How I wish I can drop everything right now and be with you and Lucas.
It's been 16 long months since I last held you, kissed you and bade you farewell. That pain is still as strong, if not stronger, but I have learnt to disguise it much better, especially in the last 6 months. But since last evening, something inside me snapped. I cannot stop crying and the pain in my heart is so bad that it makes me breathless. I have cried my eyes swollen and I don't think I have any more tears left in me.
Sweetheart, Daddy and I want you (and Lucas too) to know that we are both missing you two a lot, and we think about you all the time. Not a day has gone by without us saying your names, and not a moment has gone by without us wishing that you are here.
Happy 1st Birthday, Princess Chloe...
we hope that our little girl is having the most wonderful and perfect birthday celebration in heaven with her big brother.
Sending You Never Ending Love, Hugs and Kisses,
Daddy & Mummy
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